How do you explain periods and menstruation to your daughter?

This is it, your daughter is emerging from childhood and will soon be old enough to settle. If this is a worrying event for your pre-teen, it may also be for you, and you're now wondering how to explain periods. We'll show you how to talk to her about menarche and the menstrual cycle!


Why talk to your daughter about periods ?

As parents, your role is to prepare your children for the different stages of life, and the transition from little girl to menstruating woman is no exception!

It's also an opportunity to reassure her within the family setting, and to share your own experience of your first periods. In the months to come, you'll be forging a new relationship, between a little girl's dependence on her parents, and a discussion with a young woman! Explaining periods to your daughter will not only prevent the periods taboo from taking hold, but will also guide her in her new femininity.

When should you explain menstruation to your daughter?

This subject must be addressed spontaneously, before even before they arrive! In fact, it's very important that she prepares you psychologically to this major upheaval, as it can be quite a shock for a young teenager to find her panties stained with blood one day. In this way unpleasant surprisesand the changes that will stake place are announced in advance!

It is generally said that menstrual flow occurs at about 2 years after hair development and breast growth When you feel that puberty has begun, it's time to start talking to your daughter. around its 10th anniversary. For some, the first periods will arrive around 8-9 years of age, others only around 16, with an average around the age of 12 and generally around the same age as the mother. It's up to you to trust the signs, and whatever happens, to answer these questions if she herself takes the initiative.

It's important to show that periods is not just about taboo subjectand your daughter can talk about it freely and without embarrassment. Take the opportunity to teach the rest of the siblings about female puberty at the same time, and brief your partner on the different types of sanitary protection. In this way, boys and girls alike will have the same level of informationwith respect, comfort and privacy for everyone!

Our tips for talking to your daughter about periods

We've got plenty of tips for talking to your pre-teen at ease and without embarrassment!

Learn how the female body works

First and foremost, fear comes from ignorance: it is therefore vital that your teenage daughter knows what periods are and how the female body functions and changes:

  • About 2 years after the onset of puberty, menstruation begins, signaling the onset of fertility in women.
  • Excluding pregnancy, contraception or specific pathologies, they are present in women from the age of 12 until menopause, at around age 45.
  • This is actually blood loss due to the degradation of the uterine mucosa, which drains through the vagina.
  • Premenstrual syndrome is a warning sign of their arrival a few days before: irritability, mood swings, migraines, tense breasts...
  • It's possible to become pregnant once you've been regulated, so prevention and sex education are also important, as well as discussing the need for contraception at a later stage if necessary.
  • The female cycle repeats itself on average every 28 days, with the ovulation phase on day 14. The periods arrive at the end of the cycle and last 4 to 6 days on average.

Explaining changes during adolescence

Adolescence is a time of great hormonal upheaval. Female puberty marks the transition from little girl to young woman, with the development of body hair and breast growth in particular, under the action of thepituitary gland, which triggers a cascade ofhormonal reactions. Your teenager, who only yesterday seemed like your little baby, is becoming a woman: you, like her, may find it hard to get used to the idea! However, you can reassure her by explaining the symptoms she'll be experiencing, which are quite normal:

  • Breast development: breasts s'round out, nipples develop
  • Hair growth: pubic and armpit hairs multiply
  • Acne can appear as a result of fluctuations in testosterone levels.
  • Greater sweating thanks to sweat glands and new body odours
  • Vaginal discharge, indicating the onset of the menstrual cycle
  • The periodsThe flow of water during each cycle can be irregular during the first two years, with a capricious flow.
  • Physical maturity does not always go hand in hand with the mental maturity of a young menstruating woman: she needs to be made aware of her responsibilities, as she can now become pregnant, and needs to be vigilant about her sexuality.
  • There may be differences in the age at which these symptoms appear in young girls: reassure her that this is normal and that every woman is different.

Accompanying your daughter from the start periods

Here are a few tips to help you support your daughter from menarche onwards and sensure that she goes through her period with peace of mind:

  • Explain the different types of sanitary sprotection available to her, and their advantages and disadvantages.
  • Always carry sanitary protection with you, just in case. You can also wear a period pants as a preventive measure, when menstrual discharge is expected soon.
  • Help her keep a small notebook at periods, noting the start and end dates of her last period.
  • Reassure her that the first flows may be irregular for the first two years, until the cycle stabilizes.
  • Any significant pain is not normal, in which case it is possible to accompany her for an initial consultation with the gynaecologist or a health professional.
  • Advise her on her hygiene: buy her a deodorant to put her at ease with her new body odors, teach her how to wash her intimate area (no douching!) and how to cleanse and care for her skin to limit acne.
  • Be patient with her mood swings and hormonal variations: it's as hard for her as it is for you!
  • Be there for her, listen to her questions and try to reassure her!


If you're finding it difficult to broach the subject, we've put together a booklet on our website, Premières periods, to help you get the ball rolling.

How do you talk about periods as a dad?

Just because you're male doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about it! It's important to be as free and comfortable as possible to talk about what's happening to your daughter. Firstly, if you haven't experienced it yourself, you can compensate by reading up on the subject: if you're reading this article, that's already a good point! Your teenager shouldn't be embarrassed to talk to you about it. However, this will depend on the relationship you've had with her up to now: develop your complicity and the trust she places in you from now on!

If you don't feel comfortable talking to your daughter about these subjects in your own way, you can also entrust this task to someone who is better placed to talk to her about periods : someone close to you, your family, her GP... In any case, respect her privacy and know how to assess the situation so as not to embarrass her!

If you have alternating custody, maintain contact with the person with whom she feels most comfortable talking about it, whether it's you or her mother, giving her the option of calling if necessary.

FAQ on explaining periods to your daughter

How do you talk to your daughter about her first periods ?

You need to talk to her beforehand, before they arrive! Explain the physiological mechanisms involved, put her at ease and listen to her doubts and fears. Explain this major upheaval that's about to happen, so that she can prepare to welcome her first periods with serenity.

How do you explain the arrival of periods to your daughter?

Explain to your daughter in your own words how the female cycle works: for an average of 28 days, hormone variations follow one another, ending with the evacuation of the uterine mucosa via vaginal bleeding: that's periods ! It's a natural phenomenon, marking the beginning of a woman's life: nothing could be more normal, and all you need to do during menstruation is to use suitable sanitary protection!

 

You may also like :